I am unnaturally attracted to the easily accessible universe that is media and entertainment. Movies, Video games, and social media have become vices I’ve accepted within my daily life. This consumption has been present within my life for as long as I remember. As a kid I used to go outside enjoying my wild nature running through the woods and playing in the mud but whenever I got my first video game console the world outside seemed less enticing. I had multiple worlds at my fingertips, these worlds begging to be explored. 

What started as an experience of adventure and joy became an escape from the world I lived in. It seemed easier to escape into a character rather than face the world that asked who you are. In video games I could be whoever, through movies I could project myself onto the actors portraying my favorite characters. I thought as I grew up this was natural, this is how I was and that’s okay. Though these past times quickly went from escape to obsession. I realized I was isolating myself from reality, locking myself in my room for hours to experience these artificial worlds not embracing the real one I’m currently living within. Only now a 22-year-old do I realize how dishonest I have been with myself and I feel on the precipice of great change. I want to reconnect with the world that has been unnatural to me for so long, this heavy burden that is outside my comfort zone and which makes me utterly uneasy. 

Through my work I want to display the burden I feel in the natural world and artificial reality. The heavy toll it takes to enter this otherworld of the natural and the easily accessible artificial distractions I immerse myself in. This lightly grasped false happiness that I often subject myself to daily. This push and pull has been at the forefront of my life this past year and I wish through this art that I may either find a balance or a door to be present within my life and not let it pass me by.